just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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