so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
It's never too late to be topless.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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