a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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