I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
This baby is an asshole
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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