We're facebook friends in real life
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
You made out with two different species that night
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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