This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize