So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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