woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
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