I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
