i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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