I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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