call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize