i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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