She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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