I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
