Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
