He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
