So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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