She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
