she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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