The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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