Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
