Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
