I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
