It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Randomize
