Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize