you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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