After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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