I heard we made out
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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