I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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