Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
how does that bad decision feel?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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