is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize