Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
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she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
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hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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