He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
