i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
