quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
