how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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