SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
