i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
