Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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