oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Text me some of your sweat
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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