just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
