So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
