Well douche your snatch and let's go!
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
foreskin is a definite game changer
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
