Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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