I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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