is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
