I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
the day after is always just damage control
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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