That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
My feet surprised me
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
