Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
as a side note pls kill me
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
