fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
porn star boner night. come get it.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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