You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize